William Strunk wrote a short, valuable essay on the need to omit needless words:
"Vigorous writing is concise. A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid detail and treat his subjects only in outline, but that every word tell."
Here are some examples of wordy and redundant phrases, and ways to shorten them, so that your business writing becomes tighter and clearer.
Don't say: call your attention to the fact that
Say: remind you
Don't say: an example of this is the fact that
Say: for example
Don't say: afford an opportunity
Say: allow
Don't say: due to the fact that
Say: because
Don't say: exhibit a tendency to
Say: tend to
Don't say: for the purpose of
Say: for, to
Don't say: in reference to
Say: about, regarding
Don't say: in view of the fact that
Say: because
Don't say: in the normal course of our procedure
Say: normally
Don't say: in the majority of circumstances
Say: normally
Eliminate redundancies as well. Unnecessary modifiers slow your readers and muddy your writing.
Don't say: at this point in time
Say: now
Don't say: one a.m. in the morning
Say: one a.m.
Don't say: consensus of opinion
Say: consensus
Don't say: may possibly
Say: may
Don't say: mutual cooperation
Say: cooperation
Don't say: end result
Say: result
Don't say: plan in advance
Say: plan
Don't say: final conclusion
Say: conclusion
Don't say: refer back to
Say: refer to
Don't say: reason why
Say: reason that
Don't say: reason why is because
Say: reason is that
Don't say: resume again
Say: resume
Don't say: continue on
Say: continue
Don't say: the month of December
Say: December
Don't say: first originated
Say: originated
Don't say: my personal opinion
Say: my opinion
Don't say: enclosed herewith
Say: enclosed
Don't say: attached hereto
Say: attached
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About the author
Alan Sharpe, executive speech coach and business writing trainer, is author of
Speak Like a Leader: 101 Tips for Mastering Your Public Speaking Skills. On-site, online and over the phone, Alan teaches executives and managers how to express themselves clearly, concisely and convincingly using the written and spoken word. Receive a free tip like this each week by subscribing to his weekly newsletter,
The Confident Communicator
© 2008 Alan Sharpe.