Tips for Boomerang Kids

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Returning back to the nest… gracefully.

The unemployment rate in the US reached a 26 year high in October when it crept past the dreaded 10 percent mark. With over 16 million Americans unable to find jobs, more and more parents are finding their children returning back to the nest - and why not; since mom's and pop's house is probably the only place for these downsized and right-sized young adults to turn to where paying the utility bills, putting food in the refrigerator, cable TV and getting the laundry done etc does not cost a mini fortune. The fact of the matter is that these trying economic times have made moving back to the nest not only a financially viable option but in fact for millions of Americans it has become the only option.

However, moving back in with the folks could be anything from a seamless process to a very intricate and bumpy one. Therefore there are a few things which one should think over before making a final decision. For example, it's a good idea to ask yourself what kind of relationship you have with your folks - the dynamics of a family seldom change with time - so if your parents were controlling, nagging, probing, irritable or aggressive, there is a very slim chance that they might have changed since you moved out. Keep that at the back of your mind.

Secondly, notice whether or not the folks have downsized their house and whether or not they still have room enough to accommodate you? It's absolutely pivotal to know if there are other brothers and sisters still living with mom and dad - if yes, then it's good because the folks would still be in "parenting" mode and therefore having another son or daughter around wound not really make much of difference. However, it will be a totally different and complicated story if none of your brothers and sisters have been living with the parents for a very long time.

It's also a good idea to make a mental inventory of what you can do for your parents while you are living with them - can you mow the lawn, shovel the snow, cook, do the plumbing, the electrical work, buy the groceries etc? Look for ways to add value to the house and to save your parents some money.
Also moving back in with your parents is not the same as sharing a house with friends and roommates. There may be restrictions, rules and regulations that they would want you to adhere to. Sincerely ask yourself if you are willing to comply and give up some of your liberties, if need be.

From a parent's standpoint, what they may want to see is your effort to make things work. Go back to your academic education or learning a new skill or language, cut your spending as much as humanly possible, tell them how exactly do you plan on getting back on your feet, keep them updated on what you are doing, respectfully listen to their suggestions and advice and thank them for their patience and support. Last but not least, when you eventually move back out, send them a sincere "thank you" note - it would mean the world to them.

You can read more about the author, Gregg, and other subjects at his websites, and

‘Don't be discouraged. It's often the last key in the bunch that opens the lock".

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