In Search of the Perfect Marriage Counseling Book

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Visiting your local book store or online book retailers will quickly reveal that there are an excessive number of relationship books available. It is difficult for lay readers to make any decision as to which one is the best. In search of that book, there are some considerations.

First, I suggest you get familiar with what forms of treatment are done by professionals. For example, individual therapy usually falls under 3 basic approaches: behavioral/cognitive-behavioral; psychodynamic; and humanistic/existential. Of these the most frequently used in writing relationship books is behavioral/cognitive-behavioral. The reason is simple; there are specific techniques/behaviors prescribed and can be described in written words.

The major cognitive-behavioral approach is to suggest new interpretations, or schemas, to a patient. They are then to use their own interpretations and the new ones as they observe actual situations. If the patient finds the new schema is accurate, they are encouraged to follow this. This often results in changed behaviors based on the new schemas.

Many popular marriage counseling books present new interpretations. A large number present the information in interesting ways. By doing so, it assists people in understanding things, as well as being able to later recall the information. An example of this would be saying that men and women are from different planets. After getting one's attention, it is possible to suggest well accepted ways of dealing with relationship issues (e.g., communication training, behavioral contracting, using time outs, etc.).

A truly unique, novel view is based on the Clinical Biopsychological approach described in a 2007 professional paper by Dr. Robert A. Moss. This has led to a description of Giver and Taker behavior, though this is quite different from that described by other authors using the same terms. Despite not being one of the traditional marriage counseling books, it provides readers with an understanding of the behaviors they encounter in their marriage.

In the most recent book published this year, specific ways of dealing with one's partner are discussed. Some of these are some of the tried and true approaches, while others are new. Unlike many marriage counseling books, it is written for the individual and not the couple. Thus, it is possible for only one partner to read this and implement strategies that can improve a relationship.

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