Helping Friends and Family with Children

say a thing until she's done. She'll feel much better.

6. Also, new moms love to brag about their children. "Oh, you won't believe what Brooke did this morning. She rolled over all by herself! She's so far ahead of schedule. We think she may be gifted." Just listen and smile.

7. Tell her you want to come over and "spell" her for 20 minutes so she can lie down and rest. Even twenty minutes can be so rejuvenating.

8. Bring her a meal one evening. If you've got the time and inclination, make it yourself. If not, call a really good take-out place and have it delivered to her door.

9. Stay-at-home moms, in particular, get so used to talking in that "baby talk" voice; they need some time around adults to bring their vocal quality back down to a human level. Offer to take her out for coffee and "grown-up" conversation.

10. If you haven't had a baby, you can't imagine how little things that appear so simple can be so helpful and mean so much to your friend. For instance, while you are visiting with her, you witness her baby dropping the pacifier yet again. You, the hero, pick it up, wash it off and hand it back to mommy. Or, you take it upon yourself to wash the baby bottle when it's finished. Wow.

11. When she's ready, offer to go for an aerobic walk with her. And, when you reach an incline, offer to take the stroller and push it up the hill. Do it regularly and she'll get into shape quickly and start feeling much better about herself.

12. Along those lines, when's the last time your friend got to the gym or a yoga class? If you belong to one, offer to take her as your guest. Many gyms now have a babysitting service while you work out.

13. Next time you go to the bookstore or library, pick up a book for her. Just make sure it's not another "How to Take Care of Baby" book. I guarantee she's got plenty of those. How about some fun escapist fiction?

14. While you are visiting the new mom at her house, step into the kitchen and start washing her dishes or wiping off sticky countertops or the floor. Don't ask her, she won't accept. Just do it.

15. Can Daddy watch the baby some night for a couple of hours? Suggest he baby-sit, then take her out to a movie. Or, how about shopping? Just remember to assure her that she'll soon fit into those cute outfits she's eying.

16. Women's feet take a lot of abuse during pregnancy. It's weird, but they usually grow a size or more and get really scruffy looking. How about offering to pamper her by giving her a pedicure...or, the gift of one at nice local spa?

17. Let's not overlook the most basic of all...tell her you love her. Call her, e-mail her, or write her a card and tell her you love her. That's it. Simply, you love her.

18. And now...the piece de resistance: offer to baby-sit for an evening! Let her go out with her hubby so they can re-discover each other. Most marriages become slightly compromised when a baby comes into the picture.

19. Finally, you know your friend best. What would put a smile on her face? What could you do to lighten her load and let her breathe for a bit? Think about it, then do it. Don't wait too long. Those little infants grow into big kids faster than you can keep track.

Most of these suggestions are so simple, but they can help shift a new mom's stress into a more relaxed and joyful parenting experience.

As a mom and an entrepreneur, I thought it might be fun to put all these ideas into a coupon gift booklet that friends and family could give as a gift to the new mom. Not only would the recipient feel supported and understood, but it would be handy and practical as well. She could tear out and cash in whichever coupons she felt comfortable redeeming. I wanted to make it cute, whimsical and fun so that the new mom would find it easy to ask for support. So I created it. The New Mommy Coupon Book, Or 28 Ways to Help Her Get Through The Day is available now through Colorful Images Catalog and at my website listed below.

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