Advice for Men Facing Divorce

Divorce is not easy, especially for men. You usually only end up with visitation rights for the kids and the lawyer for your ex-wife-to-be has an IQ of 186 and they use every part of that IQ to make sure you end up with nothing-sometimes even visits with your own children. So it's not an easy thing we divorce men face. But with a little advice, we can endure and get back on track.

I asked a buddy friend of mine about his divorce and he gave me a lot of divorce men advice that I'll share with you here. I used this advice and recommend it to all men:

• First, I found out quickly how to find the right attorney that had my interests at heart, not my ex-wife-to-be. This is easy if you take the time to interview attorneys.

• I also went to our local courthouse to find out every step of a divorce including filing procedures.

• Through my attorney, I learned the art of negotiation, Donald Trump style and even got my alimony lowered. I also found out from my buddy how the courts in my town looked at child support and made sure I was paying my fair share and not more. Why should my ex-wife live off of my kids child support?

• I joined a divorce men group that told me how I could stay a part of my kid's lives and learned how to talk to them about the divorce so they didn't just blame me!

• I also found out that attempting to dress poorly in court is not a good thing, so try and look your best, judges see right through that.

• My attorney was good and taught me all about assets and gave my wife's attorney a run for her money.

• Through my negotiations, I was able to save on a trial divorce and everything was settled through an arbitrator the judge assigned. Judges like it when you can settle things with an arbitrator-they really don't want to be involved in your messy divorce; after all, they probably have been through a divorce or two themselves.

• Even though I did use an attorney, I learned so much that when another buddy asked me about divorce, I was able to help him file his own papers, watch out for his assets, get an affordable child support level set, and how to represent yourself in front of a judge.

I found in my divorce experience that men who face this are sometimes really alone and don't get a fair shake. I found this through other men I met in the hallways of our courthouse trying to find out the best tips on how to avoid all the expensive stuff and still be able to keep your deserved assets, you pride, dignity, and your rightful visits with your own children.

I recommend a divorce men group if you are going through a tough divorce because these guys have seen it all. There are also great books and DVDs on the subject that focus on the men's point of view in a divorce and what you can do to ensure you get the best deal. Like I said, divorce is never easy, but be wise about your divorce and get some help!