How I See It. Real Football Fans KEEP IT REAL!

The Match has been lit. Who would have thought just 5-6 years ago that Daunte Culpepper wouldn't even be sitting on the bench hoping to take a snap, kickin' back and getting a few reps here and there, or getting a hold during an extra point?

Now he gets to end a less-than illustrious career with no more than an escaped felony and a misdemeanor or two, no rap album, and about one one thousandth the number of passing than Brett Favre, with about 100 times more interceptions.

And "Whats his name" Alexander (the artist formerly known as the MVP running back for a Seahawk team with a coach, that shoulda-woulda-coulda never went to Seattle and just stuck with Green Bay)

Alexander doesn't even have a job does he? Let me look into my crystal ball. Hmmm, I see a football-less future, and, oh yes, a stunt double Tiki Barber look-a-like road show for extra cash. No Ronde look-a-like's though...you're just a little too fat, Shawn!

And, the New York Bretts. Wow. What a mistake that stupid Union-style board of executives made in getting rid of one of the best quarterbacks of all time that will exude sheer dominance no matter what helmet he wears. Brett will be back and will beat Green Bay in Green Bay. No crystal ball needed for that one.

And the Raiders. Well, big Al "whats his name" is still an old fogie that no doubt is losing it! Big time. Can you say...Altzeimers medication!! He needs to sell the team to North Dakota or somethin'. Shit

And the Vikings. Only two things go to Minnesota Football Programs...Where players go to die, or a beginning of a player's Free Agency. Can you say, Adrian Peterson in a Tennessee Titans jersey by 2010.

And Michael Vick...woof-woof. Nah, just crackin' on ya big Mike, the crystal ball shows me you making your first catches as a receiver in number elven jersey or suh'in. For sure. Playin' in Minnesota, no doubt. Hey, I wonder if Timberwolf Fights would be legal?

Dallas Cowboys. Tony Romo is the Next Tom Brady, in the sense of making the limelight with a hot dame by his side...that story matching Tom relationship endings, with the hotty getting good child support from him. The crystal ball shows no Super Bowl Rings in Tony's future, I'm afraid... could get some booth time on Monday Night Football, no doubt. What ever happen to gun toting Tank Johnson? Dallas needs Ricky Williams. Hey, Mike Vick would spice that team up! A.P. 2010 ??

Now, onto the real shit! Buffalo? Wow. The crystal ball shows an eleven game losing streak, though. Sorry, guys!

Who would have thought that the starting quarterback for the Cardinals won a Super Bowl a few years back and you can even get his #13 jersey for $9 at just about any sports store that carries it. I think I got mine on EastBay, but they charged me free shipping since it was a Puma jersey and the ad said Reebok. $3 on eBay!

Jeremy Shockey. Man, that dude lost some weight. He was a crybaby in New York even with a Super Bowl win, he needs to just be a male stripper or something at female bachelor parties and he sucked against the Redskins week 2 (which was a game I personally attended- Second Row, Right End Zone)

My only complaint about the game was that the hearing impared fans need a little more attention. Show em some love, Break out the cash Dan Snyder. And watch them beer attendants, a tip-keep your plastic cups and keep coming back to section 13 and them guys will fill your cups up all night if you tip them less than half then $8 per draw that gets Mr. Snyder all that revenue!

Which leads me to the Washington Redskins. These guys have been through a hell of a lot in one year, and if you are a true 'Skins fan, then you already know that WE NEED OUR MEDICATION! Washington is looking solid and it is time for a Super Bowl.

Joe Gibbs set it up last year with a little Nostalgia, and now I am afraid that the Redskins are going to bring it all the way back to the house. I was wrong about Mr. Jason Campbell, but don't make me eat those words, Jase!

The 'skins are lookin' sharp, silent but violent- the quiet boys in the back letting the crowd clear out then takin' every ass at the cheer leader party, baby! Mustering up memories of #21 and his belongings still sitting in that untouched locker every time the guys get together for practice.

The Redskins will go to the Super Bowl but the Crystal Ball gets cloudy after that. And who will they play? Do I see Chad Johnson (since that's what his jersey says since he is broke and can't buy all those jerseys back since he spent all that green on that ice in his 94 karat grill). Oh wait...No, that's just the OCHO PUTO commercial during the half time break.

Is it, Brett-the- Threat- Favre I see throwing pass attempts against that wicked 'Skins "D" in the Big Game? The Uniform "Looks" green. Or maybe that's just the 'game day' bag of stash I will be breakin' out for the big day that I will get for my February birthday.

Keep pumpin' sports fans. Get those jerseys and keep it real. If you change your favorite Team every year to the Team that won the previous years' Super Bowl...Then guess what? You ain't a 'playa' and you're no doubt bangin' second rate, low rent snatch...If any at all

Playas git theirs! Alright fools, time for me to hand this bitch off, aw hell no, that was a flea flicker- deep to #89...TD, baby. T effin' D!

You heard it here!

About the author:
Bigpix originally published this article at rootzoo.com. He can often be found sharing his love for football on their nfl football forums and fantasy football chat.