Recently I completed some new workshop engagements in
addition to my coaching and week-long programs. I am very
grateful for the opportunity to stretch and learn but am
also acutely aware of the stress I am feeling taking on this
new work.
Indeed, I am feeling more stress than I care to admit to.
Too often I find myself driven by feelings of "I don't know
enough, not prepared enough, don't have enough time, don't
have the right answers to their problems…" Translation? "I
am not enough; I feel inadequate, anxious, afraid; I won't
be able to do it right." (Although, a part of me knows with
certainty I'll do just fine!)
It is interesting how we suffer the same feelings when we're
not working… "not feeling good enough, feeling a lack of the
skills, knowledge, experience, answers needed to career
change." Unemployed or working; money or lack thereof; a
relationship or not; we must somehow come to peace with this
old ghost that so regularly haunts most of us. Louise Haye,
author and internationally acclaimed healer proclaims, "I am
not good enough, I am not worthy" is at the core of all
humanity.
Rather than continually buy into the idea that the right
job, education, experience, skills, relationship, income
will make us feel OK; instead, it is helpful to acknowledge
the feelings under these thoughts. If we can feel and
acknowledge our fear, inadequacy, unworthiness, we can begin
to see all the different ways we want to run from it; all
the different things we grasp at to make us feel better.
Grasping at externals to allay our fears only drives us
further and faster from our truth. Herein, are a few
strategies that have helped me manage my stress and
inadequacies lately.
I discovered life-giving cues within "The Secret Garden."
Yes, the one you read as a child by "Frances Hodgson
Burnett." Recently I reread this delightful book and highly
recommend it to you. You won't be disappointed.
Each night, I happily informed my family I was going to bed
early, and slipped into to my "Secret Garden." Pressures,
anxieties, fears of the day (and future) disappeared as I
pushed aside the long, sweeping ivy covering the secret door
and entered that hidden haven of peace, sweet fragrance and
green growing things.
Children, who had been crippled physically, mentally and
emotionally by a lack of love, constant negativity, and
having everything their own way, slowly but surely became
healed within the secret garden. The fresh air; working in
the dirt; having a place of safety and beauty; learning to
love all living things; and wonderful positive camaraderie
caused the children to bloom as surely as the crocuses in
springtime.
Couldn't we all do with our own "Secret Garden?" Finding,
tending, minding, our own "Secret Garden" can give us solace
and healing too. As they say in the "Secret Garden,"
"Where we tend roses; thistles cannot grow."
Even if we do not own a piece of dirt we can all create our
own Secret Garden. How do we find the hidden key and secret
door? We find the "buried" key to our garden by returning to
our breath. One breath at a time we find our way into that
haven of peace and safety within each of us.
Each breath brings us back into the present moment. Being
Wholly Present is being in the Holy Presence. We can take
this even further by literally getting down on our knees to
pray in yet, more earnestness.
I've been praying on my knees for "grace and ease" in my
life and work lately. It seems to me my earnest prayers are
always answered (though perhaps not how I imagined). My
anxious burdens are lifted (at least for a time!) No doubt
we would be best off just staying on our knees! I am not
calling for religious converts here but rather suggesting
simple, life-giving practices.
Another wonderful technique that continues to help me
alleviate stress and fear is to listen to Bach. Or Mozart.
Or Vivaldi. Try any classical music that suits you.
This timeless music shifts us into a different part of our
brain and can ease us emotionally as well. Put on your
favorite classical music and really bring all of your
awareness to listening to the notes, instruments, melodies.
See if you don't feel refreshed, lighter, more at peace.
Oh yes, and remember to trust and breathe!
Visit Teresa at href="http://www.yourlifework.com">http://www.yourlifework.
com
Find support, insight and inspiration for your career and
lifework path. Teresa; writer, facilitator and mentor, has
helped thousands of people navigate their lifework path.
Teresa reminds us to be gentle with ourselves and enjoy
where we are today!