PLEASING EVERYBODY IS IMPOSSIBLE

Pleasing Everybody Is Impossible!
by
Monica Burns-Capers

There is no way in this world to getting everyone to agree on everything that you say or do. When you expect this, you are setting yourself up for disappointment. We are all made with different personalities and have our own opinions for a reason. Besides, if we all thought the same, the world would be less exciting.

We should all be surrounded with friends and/or family who will take an honest approach towards us. What we shouldn't have are friends and/or family who wants us to partake in anything that we are in
disagreement about, especially if they're the only people who's benefiting. When you spend your life pleasing others, resentment will often times sneak up on you, leaving your relationship with the
person(s) that you're trying to please in serious turmoil. Also, the person(s) that you're trying to please shouldn't be placing such responsibility on you anyway. These people are either living through you or they have the audacity to think that you owe them for something. For instance, if you are a parent whom has ruined your child's credit opening up all sorts of accounts in their name, because you were irresponsible with your own credit in your past- this is a clear sign of you thinking that your child owes
you something in life. You can't use the same redundant statement: "Well, I took care of you all your life, the least you can do is help me out and take care of some things for me." You made taking care of your child your responsibility, when you decided to conceive your child. The child owes you nothing. Give your child the option to offer assistance to you, if they are in a financial situation to do so. You have no right to just take anything from them for your own selfish reasons. Insisting that your child
take a dance class that he/she is clearly not interested in, but it's something you wanted to do as a child, is a classic case of you living through your child. Now, you are really setting yourself up for disaster.

When anyone is forced to do anything, sooner or later, they are going to wake-up and realize "This is not what I want to do with my life. Mom/Dad this was your dream, not mine!" So now what? Why do
you think so many college students start out wanting to be doctors, lawyers, etc., and then drastically changing their majors to Fine Arts, Dance, Music, etc., or something unlike any expectations that their parents might have had for them. Allow your child to choose for themselves. The goal should be to tell your child to choose whatever makes them happy and brings peace to them in their lives. As the parent, you can still join a dance class if dancing is what you want to do. It's never too late to study for your degree, if a doctor is what you want to be; however, don't live through your child or force them to think that they owe you for taking care of them.

Pleasing others should be a feeling of choice. When we excel in areas of our lives that we independently chose for ourselves, and we actually love what we do; our loved ones should be genuinely happy for us without placing unrealistic expectations upon us. This should be the only feeling of pleasing that we should have efficient room for in each of our lives.

Monica Burns-Capers
Copyright ©2008 Monica Burns-Capers. All Rights Reserved.

Monica Burns-Capers is an Expert Author, Freelance Writer, Consultant, Adjunct College Instructor and President/CEO of Monica Mi'Chelle Communications: A Professional Writing and Self-Development Firm. For More Information, Visit Her Website At: www.monicamburns.com .