At the time I could see there was a problem but didn't have the language to explain it to him. His problem was not one of personality but one of calibration. His energy was high and when he'd come in contact with someone who was more of an introvert, he didn't know how to create a rapport with them because he couldn't pull his energy closer to their level.
Calibrating with others requires us to fine tune our movements, cadence, rhythm, tone (etc.) with whomever we're talking to. If I'm chatting with someone who is of lower energy, someone who sighs a lot or breathes deeply, I will match this level of energy. Likewise, if I'm with a fidgeter, someone whose energy is higher or manic, I will raise my energy to meet theirs.
The calibration effect refers to the impact we have on those around us as well as their effect on us. When we are out of sync, we often manifest problems. By checking in with our own state and the states of those around us, we pick up a wealth of information.
Simply put, calibration is energy work.
Recently I posted an article with the exercise of 'trying on someone else's skin'. By becoming one with our potential clients we speed up trust and rapport incredibly. The response I get most often when I do this is 'Man, it feels like we've known each other forever.'
Sometimes this level of calibration is so intense that it elicits supernatural confessions, as in, 'It feels like we knew each other in a past life.' Practically, logically, I understand not everyone subscribes to the concept of reincarnation, however, even if you don't believe in this, think of how much trust and rapport is necessary for someone to say (let alone believe) that this is possible. If they feel this comfortable with you as to say something like that, they'll most likely feel comfortable doing business with you as well.
Another phenomenal calibration exercise I posted an article about is the concept of surrounding ourselves in pink bubbles. This is a mutual calibration which encompasses both you and your prospect or client and evens out the level of energy between you again creating an instant trust and rapport.
For phenomenal group rapport building look for 'shovel it up, filter it out' which explains one of the most amazing techniques I know for creating instant trust with large groups of people. I find that when I use this, I seldom leave the seminar exhausted because I'm keeping the positive and 'up' energy and filtering out the negative, tired energy.
If you missed these posts, go back and have a look. You'll find your results with rapport skyrocket.
Kenrick Cleveland teaches techniques to sell to affluent clients using persuasion strategies. He runs unique public and private seminars and offers home study courses, audio/visual learning tools, and coaching programs in persuasion techniques. Find more free articles at www.MAXpersuasion.com/blog. Be sure to sign up for his free report entitled "Yes! Persuasion."